Poker Quotes


World Poker Tour Quotes

    "It's so quiet in here you can actually hear Phil Hellmuth thinking to himself, 'I am the best player at this table'." -- Norman Chad.

    "It looks like we have a win-win situation on our hands." -- Mike Sexton, after Men "The Master" Nguyen and Danny Nguyen are both all-in against each other

    "I want this guy doing my taxes!" -- Vince Van Patten, commenting about a nerdy looking player

Humor

    "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright

    "Ever since he quit drinking he's been on a roll." -- Phil Gordon, about Gavin Smith on Poker After Dark

    "Asking where to find the softest 1/2 games is like asking which McDonald's has the best Big Mac." -- callipygian, TwoPlusTwo poster, when replying to someone who asked where the loosest Las Vegas low-limit games are

    "'The Crew' was poker's version of the Backstreet Boys - cute for a minute but nowhere to be seen now" - random

    "If luck weren't involved, I guess I'd win every tournament." -- Phil Hellmuth

Strategy

    "My game plan is usually to have no game plan" -- Scott Fischman, when talking about his tournament strategy

    "If you’re a good player see the flop often – most people won’t know how to play the flop." -- Erik123, when giving advice to new players

    "Never judge anybody at the table; a man can be the greatest poker player and he might know all the numbers, but he might get beaten by a really savvy kid who works in a grocery store. And that's what so great about this game." -- James Woods, when talking about his love of poker

    "When you go card dead its torture just sitting there." -- Doyle Brunson, Poker After Dark

    "The majority of players are looking for reasons to fold. I am looking for reasons to play." -- Daniel Negreanu

    "You can't bluff someone that's not paying attention." -- Joe Mantegna's character, in House of Games, a David Mamet movie.

Personal Stories

    "It was like taking someone to the dentist for the first time. You try to tell them it will be OK and make them feel better." -- Marcel Luske, when talking about how nervous David Williams was when he coached him at the World Series

    "I practically grew up with a deck of cards in my crib." -- Andy Bloch, when talking about his proficiency with cards

    "That's why I don't read books because I don't want to change my own style. Everyone has been successful with their own style." TJ Cloutier - Poker After Dark

    "You call...gonna be all over, baby." -- Scotty Nguyen, during the 1998 World Series of Poker. Down to the final 2 players, he said this to his opponent while he held the best possible hand

    "What took me decades to learn, these kids can get on the Internet...What I learned by brute force, dealing out hands, they learn on computers. It tends to make for fairly technical players, but they make up for it with aggression, the kind that comes when you learn things fast." -- Doyle Brunson

    "I once went a whole summer without seeing the sun. I would play all night, then sleep all day." -- Doyle Brunson

Philosophy

    "In order to live, you must be willing to die." -- Amir Vahedi, when talking about poker tournament strategy

    "Cards are war, in disguise of a sport." -- Charles Lamb, "Essays of Elia" (1832)

    "Myself, and the deck." -- David Benyamine, when asked about his toughest opponent at the table

    "An hour of doing nothing and two minutes of terror." -- Joe Awada, when describing no-limit hold 'em.

    "Poker is not a game where the meek shall inherit the earth." -- Doyle Brunson

    "Winning poker is usually boring poker." - Matt Lessinger, The Book of Bluffs

    "Limit poker is a science, but no limit is an art. In limit, you are shooting at a target. In no limit, the target comes alive and shoots back at you." -- Crandall Addington

    "Sometimes making the right move is not enough" -- Chirs "Jesus" Ferguson

    "Whether he likes it or not, a man's character is stripped bare at the poker table; if the other players read him better than he does, he has only himself to blame. Unless he is both able and prepared to see himself as others do, flaws and all, he will be a loser in cards, as in life." -- Anthony Holden (from "Big Deal")

    "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss

    "Poker rooms are the most socioeconomically and ethnically diverse places in the country." -- PBS.org article

    "The guy who invented poker was bright, but the guy who invented the chip was a genius." -- Big Julie

    "In order to play high-stakes poker, you need to have a total disregard for money." -- Doyle Brunson

    "They're my chips. You're just holding them for me." -- Fulltilt Poker commercial

    "Coming in second in a tournament is like coming in second in a boxing match." -- Jennifer Harman

    "Being a professional poker player has been very difficult for me. In what other profession can you be at the top and have so many unsatisfying moments?" -- Phil Hellmuth

Movies

    "Your father didn't exactly leave us well-off you know. . . Your father didn't meet an inside straight he didn't like." -- Hearts in Atlantis

    "I don't know about the four 9's but I think the ace is pretty hot." -- George Clooney in Ocean's Eleven

    "Four of a kind gets beaten by a Royal Flush approximately once in never." -- random internet commenter, in reference to the unlikely endings of many famous poker films, such as The Cincinnati Kid

Home Poker

    "No matter how bad I run in poker, I always come home to a wonderful wife willing to pretend she cares about my hand histories." -- @GrandpaYeti, Twitter user.

COMMENTS:

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Pokerbuff on March 2, 2019

EricBurkholz01 on March 1, 2019

What was I supposed to do - call him for cheating better than me, in front of the others?

mrkromer on September 18, 2009

Quotes

HPG ADMIN on June 15, 2006